From Imrae's Journal: http://www.nwnravenloft.com/forum/index.php?topic=38667
Reflecting on the Past, My life before servitude is a mystery to me. When I was a child, my purpose was to heal the broken. Within the dungeons of Winterhold, high in the Spine of Faerun, I was tasked with keeping those fallen of the gladiator arena alive, if they were to survive. It was here that I witnessed Torm's power, It was here I was brought, and it was here that I dedicated myself to the teachings of the one who's follower stole me away from my place with the broken and the fallen.
I fell in love with the man who rescued me. Through his service, he was tasked with keeping a group of sailors and fishermen safe as they traveled the Sword Coast and I had the honor to follow with him. There, in the candlelit rooms of the ships we journeyed with, he taught me Faerun's history and Torm's purpose within it. My bond with this man grew strong through time, but my reluctance to tell him of my feelings has become my downfall. Forever I have been a servant of some higher power. Forever I have known only humility towards the one I serve, and it has lost me true happiness. The overwhelming happiness towards the man who saved me has been lost in sight of servitude. If I had simply forsaken living for and serving some higher power, my spirit would still be saved. But now... Now, I am simply fodder for the livestock. Were your words truthful? Were you simply expressing the cruelest form of harm one could cause without breaking my skin? You have destroyed what faith I had of ascending. The purpose of the Mists has been revealed to me. How could something so elusive exist? How could this mist reach to my home and pull me into darkness, forcing me to forsake Celestia? My faith was strong. My duty to Torm was honourable, but to what end? How could Torm allow me to be stolen of his promise to me but still tempt me with his divi-.. There is no angelic realm or plane of hell in this place. Any hope of ascending upon death to the realms of the ones we serve is folly. We are all trapped, both spiritually and physically. We are all fodder for the cruel cycle. I will not succomb to lies. Yes, I am in a place where the borders are governed by an unknown force, but why should I believe it dictates my life after mortal death? We are simply within another world. He shared what knowledge he has of the worlds known, how they are connected and how some places within this forsaken domain share resemblance with those beyond our reach. So much knowledge he shared, I felt as if I was a child once again, learning of my new surroundings. There is hope for us beyond this place. Hope that many have yet to understand or come to discover. Hope that others deny and speak lies against. We are not trapped here, we are simply being tested and tried. Tonight, I rest upon new ground. I need to have a better understanding of what is happening around me. There are so many things that have been whispered and hinted at, but still so much that is unclear. As I sit here upon the grass of Har-Thelen, I wonder if I would have ever known such a place without first knowing the people that brought me here. How could such a place be hidden or unknown to the lives of those who live in the lands connected by the mists? We were intercepted by a Dementlieu guard a few weeks ago who was collecting a new tax from Outsiders. Tessaryn, Arianwen and a few others who were with us. Upon mentioning Vallaki, the guarda simply looked stunned, confused with the mention of the city, as if he had never heard of it before. How could they collect tax from Outsiders that have come from beyond the mists and remain unaware of the cities that the mists connect to? This realm holds too many secrets and too many shadows. I noticed Leander boarding the caravan for Barovia earlier, but could not reach him in time to stop him. Rue and Tali appeared within the camp, shortly after he left. I can only imagine what the situation was that was unfolding. What has happened between the Wayfarers and both Leander and Renee is but a small, if not miniscule part of a bigger problem. What is our purpose here, if not -.. Life force? [the writing seems to be a bit lighter at this point, as if the quill had not been pressed as hard] Too many questions. Too many things unanswered. Justice demands the conclusion of what is truth within the halls of law and order and I must seek the truth of the shadows that surround me, for that is Torm's domain. I will not remain idle. "... to see a Wayfarer...share my value. Hmmn. A rare thing indeed." His words were not abrasive, but too many more questions are formed from the statement. Too many questions, but where to start? A temple of Tymora was reported to be under attack during random nights by a local gang. It was unclear whether this temple was under persecution during the Time of Troubles, but due to Torm's relationship with Helm and Tyr, it was within our domain to investigate. We were always just. We did not persecute without knowing truth and bringing that truth into the light. But, in this place, a place within the mists, there is no temple of Torm. There are no others that I can call brothers and sisters in faith to Torm. Tessaryn is the closest to a sister that I have in this regard, but.. I don't.. The Wayfarers. The closest thing that I can consider to be family, but everyone has their secrets, right? What did his words mean? Just more questions to be answered. I hate remaining in the dark. I can't believe this. Faint Memories, Was it a dream? Perhaps a sense of deja-vu? I felt as I had been here before, feeling the cold damp on my skin, hearing the echo of the gurgling through the stone corridors. Maybe my mind was simply remembering a previous time we had come here, to this cave in Blaustein. Within, I found a book upon the floor. A strange thing, for the creatures here to keep such an item. "The Illusion of Free Will". The book speaks about how one's actions are simply predetermined responses, created from one's upbringing and animalistic nature. I do not believe this to be false, of course, as I was taught to follow in Torm's light, and thus I strive to do, but those of a more horrific upbringing are prone to a criminal nature. Thus is the balance of law and chaos, of good and evil. But, to suggest the control of one's thoughts and actions, to keep society from falling into chaos? Such speak is chaos itself, for there can be no balance when one side is controlled by the other. Yes, I fight for what is good and just, but I would not stand for a power such as the Illithid possess. Our thoughts and actions are given guidance by our nature, set in stone as we travel through life. This does not mean that we lack free will. We all have choices to make, but will always seek to lean one way more than the other. Having the power to dominate society through the control of thoughts is what would eliminate free will. Our nature guides us, not the hand of some wizard of higher power, nor should such power be suggested. I haven't been lied to, but neither have I been told the truth by the ones I need to hear it from. The stories and whispers I have uncovered are hard to believe. Why would some information stay hidden, if not to simply keep someone else protected by a veil of falsehood? Shouldn't trust be the solid foundation for which we build ourselves upon? There are too many questions still. Too many shadows. Am I the only one concerned with finding the truth of these allegations? Do the others know what I know? I have been from Vallaki to the Tser pool more times than I can count, but.. This time was different. This time, I was not seeking to employ myself to serve justice against the undeath of the crypts, but for the pursuit of truth. For there can be no justice without truth. And what I uncovered... Simply asks more questions. "Have a good death." His words were more of a hint to my future than anything else. A warning? No. I do not fear death, but I do not expect it at this point in my life. He is a Tempuran, after all. Such is the nature of his faith. But, something was different with him. Something changed, a dark aura. Depression? Maybe. Such was not his nature a short time ago, but then again, we are driven by the things that happen to us throughout life, are we not? I make my way now back to the lodge. Back to Vallaki, in hopes to find Arianwen or Tessaryn. I have too many questions; too many things to ask. Too many things known that they may not be aware of. But most of all... I just need to see them again, for they are my family. I did not make this decision off of a whim. After joining, it was brought to light the more literal thoughts of those within. I went to Arianwen to speak to her about what was told to me, since there was much I had heard that had not been recorded in the Kinship's logs. I trusted her to give me clarity and reassurance, to guide me. Instead, I was treated as a stranger who simply came asking questions. She immediately became defensive, as if there was some dark secret I was poking at, or as if I was implicating someone specific. This is not something I seek in a leader; I needed her to be open with me. The members of the Wayfarer Kinship are going through many hardships currently, and I am always willing to assist them with pushing back the darkness, as it has been since Renee and I first spoke, but I cannot continue to act under their unspoken code, or judge with them the individuals who are being judged without facts. "....we do not have evidence...." Justice comes from judgement, but judgement cannot be found except through truth. Such is how the halls of law and order function. Without such, we find only Chaos. She appeared from whispers and mist; a little girl, apparently lost and searching for her mother. I would not comment openly about how it pained me to see this little girl. My own childhood is unknown to me before my early teens. Sadness overcame me in this moment, a wanting to help this girl find her mother, as I never knew my own. But, logic kept me safe this evening. The Mists were simply playing tricks on Sedrik and I. Nothing but lies and games. We returned to the fire in front of the tent shortly after the girl disappeared. The days of watching the caravan come and go and expecting to see her step from it finally paid off, in a sense. It is apparent by her questions that Tali and Arianwen do not share all information with her or the other Wayfarers. I had to explain myself again; tell her my reasons. She kept asking, "But what if you are wrong?". I have placed no judgement upon anyone for which I have no facts to supply. I am not wrong. If following what was taught to me within Torm's temple would lead me to be wrong in my decisions, then my faith is a lie. This is not something I can believe. Still, I was overjoyed to see her, even if I didn't express it. She embraced me, called me her sister. If I had no modesty of me, my returned embrace would have possibly crushed her within her chainmail. Would I slip from the path of righteousness by giving in to emotion? A man came from the shadows in front of the Inn, rapier in hand. I do not know who he was, no names were exchanged. "The time for words is over." A mercenary? Hired blade? No. He was finely dressed and was well-spoken. Immediately, he charged towards me. I suspected he was undead until my healing touch failed to damage him in any way, I also did not sense an aura of chaos about him. Perhaps he was simply mad? Under the influence of a drug, or being controlled? I do not know. If I find Tessaryn or the others before leaving, I will have yet another question to ask. As she fled within a cloud of mist, I took note of the direction she took. A black cloaked woman, wielding a staff that grasped a crystal ball. The necromancer she claimed to be. Two adventurers wished to help the church by slaying the undead that lurked below, and I was inclined to assist them. Upon reaching the large chamber on the second level, I noticed the woman in the back corner, hovering over the right coffin. The other undead within the tomb failed to see her as a hostile, and I knew in that moment that we should have left. What would prompt this fool of a man to approach the necromancer? It mattered not. He was felled by the woman after my repeated attempts to ask him to flee. I couldn't leave him there, alone on the cold floor where undead tread. I left a letter with the Kinship to inform them. My divine touch put her to rest and I had no time to try and find the coffin, The stranger spoke that there was a problem in this town. A raven came to me to guide me to the stranger. It was a raven, yes, but I do not think this is our dear friend who once approached us through shadow. Still, this stranger's words strike my interest. What darkness glooms within the place he mentioned? I shall have to discover it myself. Law. It is what has found both Natalie and Dante imprisoned. It was of their own hand, yes, but perhaps through this situation, some good can be done through diplomacy, but only if the others are successful. Dante was hanged. It was his choice. Samson tried to stop them, and I felt compelled to keep order. If Dante didn't want to turn himself in, for whatever reason, he wouldn't have came. Diplomacy was not an option as the others stated. No one spoke to us about a negotiation. This has put a bad taste in my mouth towards those within the camp. I do not agree with Elrilad's actions, but I had not the strength to stop him. They kept running, despite my asking him not to, calling me names as they fled. And for what? Wanting order and their safety? There was no respect for Dante's wishes in this moment and their actions could cause Vallaki to post bounties for everyone involved, It is a fine line we walk, between helping our friends and following our faith. The gossip of this town that the stranger has sent me to has shed some light on the problems surrounding the area. Whether I can put trust in them or not will be proven with time. I have scoured the farmland and town itself, every unlocked door, finding nothing out of the ordinary. The small shed that the Kinship once delved into is simply that. No entrance to underground caves exist, it is all collapsed. I am expanding my search outward. What did he want? Why was he following me? It did not matter to me at this point. He was here, and I had not the power to slay him. But if he were to attack, I would die wielding my blade against him. But, he did not. He spoke to me, in a calm manner. "Why would I harm you?" I could not believe it, at first. But again, this land has proven to have surprises around each corner. He has directed his thirst towards those who murder against law or commit other forms of evil acts. Self-righteous? Possibly. I am compelled in this moment, both feeling the need to lay his corpse into a final rest and to see justice done for the greater good. My divine would never reach his skin, however. How could I fight someone with the power to stop time itself?, I did not know you as a close friend. The first time I spoke to you was soon after the passing of Renee. My heart broke for you, watching you slump in the chair beside the fireplace. The code of the Kinship guides you then and now and though you fight against the evil nature that has made you by performing righteous acts, you must know that the end is ever approaching. You must prepare for it. [a spot is drawn here, as if to depict a puddle of water or a drop of blood], I have discovered the source of the cold in Kroftburg, The stranger prepared a horse for me to do so. I had almost forgotten the feeling, cool wind blowing through my hair after pushing my hood back, galloping through mountains and plains. Bliss is often a difficult thing to come by in one's life, especially for those who live within this place. I was nearly blind to those I passed, ever focused on both the rush of riding horseback and my goal. Gunnar did not respond to my letter. I fear he may be crossing a path of which the only return is death itself. Something battles within me. Something I keep hidden and locked away, but is always persistent. I have changed and am still changing, and I am not sure if I agree with it or not. So many things I have seen and been a part of here, and yet I do not feel at home anywhere I go. I act on my own, my only guidance being what I have learned previous to being brought here. I need to find a place I can call my own. I want a family. The lines are becoming blurred. I think I am losing myself. I am enjoying giving in to emotion, but am fearful of where it may lead. Michael would have wanted me to be happy, even if this could never be permanent. Torm's voice, once heard within my prayers, is replaced by personal desire. The short-sightedness of the few that contribute to our discussion sickens me. To my left and right, knowledgeable, intelligent and understanding folk, but in front of me, immaturity. Discussing law and justice amongst barbarians is fruitless, as has been proven to me time and time again. I do not agree with your statement, no, but that does not mean I do not want the same end. Leander seeks Barovian justice, as proven by his actions. That is not a valid reason to have him slain, and chasing this reason directs one towards the path of chaos. It is truly surprising to me, to hear of someone wanting to so freely throw themselves into the arms of darkness. Seek to put him to rest because of what he is and walk the path of light. Three days lost within the Mist, yet by some miracle, I came out alive. I have become too reckless with my own life. My quest from Neverwinter to Luskan was to engage in and allow support to Tymora's church, yet I spend my time fulfilling my own foolish errands. If I knew I shouldn't have said what I did, then why did I say it? I have allowed myself into confusion and I do not know why. I have forsaken friendship for a clouded sense of duty, failing to uphold even the simple ideals taught when I was rescued. I have wounded the wrong folk. I wish I could go back to the beginning. Time spent within prayer, hours within the silence, begging for Torm to answer me was met with... A whisper. What is this dark power that traps us all here? The Mists are but a tool, controlled by something hidden in shadow. If Torm cannot answer a simple prayer, how is it he is able to gift me the powers that seem to grow with each passing day? My prayer was answered not by Torm, but by something else... Something shrouded... Something I cannot yet describe. How could it be? I have served many years within the shared halls of Tyr's and Torm's faithful, yet the little time I have spent here has grown me in powers I never imagined to have. I can feel the ability to wield the fabled blade of holy nearly within my grasp... I have questions. Some that cannot be answered by those that dwell within their individual sects. How can I serve the multitude of broken and lost souls that reside here and fight against the demons and devils without first knowing the truth of this place? There are only a few that I know would have the answers, or might have the answers, but to seek them out is a dangerous road to take. But still, truth demands bravery. I have been productive, I think. Had I not sought to correct my mistakes, I would have been my own undoing, and if it were possible to return to the beginning, I would have. But I cannot. The things I have said against whom I once called family was a great fault of my own. I allowed untruth to guide my judgement and was greatly mislead. The only solace I can find from this is through the highly undeserving forgiveness that has been offered so far by those I have had the chance to seek it from. There is no guidance from Mount Celestia that I can see or hear in this place, so I must try to act as The Loyal Fury would see fit. The time spent questioning my faith has yielded only a wane of my abilities. I will let his past answers echo within my mind as a reminder of his guidance and will stay faithful in prayer and duty to his domain and his alone. The gates are opened and I have returned to Barovia, Wachter lands, My first few days have been met with a cleric who both claims to be an Ezrite and attacks random companions, a monstrous werewolf beast that we were able to chase off, an appearance of many monsters from within the Mists in front of the Lady's Rest and a Caliban who calls the Vallaki sewers his home, attacking any who delve below. Though, I fear another darkness that is brewing. One that may be guided back to the light, if reached in time. I will seek you out, my friend, before salvation becomes lost. Dare I record recent events as a scribe in my own book?, I must ask for help, Gunnar. I have heard nothing from you in three days since you walked beyond the castle's gates. I fear you are lost - not to yourself, but as a guest in his home. This fate drills in the back of my mind and grows in pain with each passing day. There are others who can help before such actions as you proposed must be taken. I'm tired of hiding, tired of being the person I do not want to be. If this place is truly to be my test, why not give everything I have to pass it - duty, loyalty to justice, obedience? Emotion.. True emotion..
Reflecting on the Past, My life before servitude is a mystery to me. When I was a child, my purpose was to heal the broken. Within the dungeons of Winterhold, high in the Spine of Faerun, I was tasked with keeping those fallen of the gladiator arena alive, if they were to survive. It was here that I witnessed Torm's power, It was here I was brought, and it was here that I dedicated myself to the teachings of the one who's follower stole me away from my place with the broken and the fallen.
I fell in love with the man who rescued me. Through his service, he was tasked with keeping a group of sailors and fishermen safe as they traveled the Sword Coast and I had the honor to follow with him. There, in the candlelit rooms of the ships we journeyed with, he taught me Faerun's history and Torm's purpose within it. My bond with this man grew strong through time, but my reluctance to tell him of my feelings has become my downfall. Forever I have been a servant of some higher power. Forever I have known only humility towards the one I serve, and it has lost me true happiness. The overwhelming happiness towards the man who saved me has been lost in sight of servitude. If I had simply forsaken living for and serving some higher power, my spirit would still be saved. But now... Now, I am simply fodder for the livestock. Were your words truthful? Were you simply expressing the cruelest form of harm one could cause without breaking my skin? You have destroyed what faith I had of ascending. The purpose of the Mists has been revealed to me. How could something so elusive exist? How could this mist reach to my home and pull me into darkness, forcing me to forsake Celestia? My faith was strong. My duty to Torm was honourable, but to what end? How could Torm allow me to be stolen of his promise to me but still tempt me with his divi-.. There is no angelic realm or plane of hell in this place. Any hope of ascending upon death to the realms of the ones we serve is folly. We are all trapped, both spiritually and physically. We are all fodder for the cruel cycle. I will not succomb to lies. Yes, I am in a place where the borders are governed by an unknown force, but why should I believe it dictates my life after mortal death? We are simply within another world. He shared what knowledge he has of the worlds known, how they are connected and how some places within this forsaken domain share resemblance with those beyond our reach. So much knowledge he shared, I felt as if I was a child once again, learning of my new surroundings. There is hope for us beyond this place. Hope that many have yet to understand or come to discover. Hope that others deny and speak lies against. We are not trapped here, we are simply being tested and tried. Tonight, I rest upon new ground. I need to have a better understanding of what is happening around me. There are so many things that have been whispered and hinted at, but still so much that is unclear. As I sit here upon the grass of Har-Thelen, I wonder if I would have ever known such a place without first knowing the people that brought me here. How could such a place be hidden or unknown to the lives of those who live in the lands connected by the mists? We were intercepted by a Dementlieu guard a few weeks ago who was collecting a new tax from Outsiders. Tessaryn, Arianwen and a few others who were with us. Upon mentioning Vallaki, the guarda simply looked stunned, confused with the mention of the city, as if he had never heard of it before. How could they collect tax from Outsiders that have come from beyond the mists and remain unaware of the cities that the mists connect to? This realm holds too many secrets and too many shadows. I noticed Leander boarding the caravan for Barovia earlier, but could not reach him in time to stop him. Rue and Tali appeared within the camp, shortly after he left. I can only imagine what the situation was that was unfolding. What has happened between the Wayfarers and both Leander and Renee is but a small, if not miniscule part of a bigger problem. What is our purpose here, if not -.. Life force? [the writing seems to be a bit lighter at this point, as if the quill had not been pressed as hard] Too many questions. Too many things unanswered. Justice demands the conclusion of what is truth within the halls of law and order and I must seek the truth of the shadows that surround me, for that is Torm's domain. I will not remain idle. "... to see a Wayfarer...share my value. Hmmn. A rare thing indeed." His words were not abrasive, but too many more questions are formed from the statement. Too many questions, but where to start? A temple of Tymora was reported to be under attack during random nights by a local gang. It was unclear whether this temple was under persecution during the Time of Troubles, but due to Torm's relationship with Helm and Tyr, it was within our domain to investigate. We were always just. We did not persecute without knowing truth and bringing that truth into the light. But, in this place, a place within the mists, there is no temple of Torm. There are no others that I can call brothers and sisters in faith to Torm. Tessaryn is the closest to a sister that I have in this regard, but.. I don't.. The Wayfarers. The closest thing that I can consider to be family, but everyone has their secrets, right? What did his words mean? Just more questions to be answered. I hate remaining in the dark. I can't believe this. Faint Memories, Was it a dream? Perhaps a sense of deja-vu? I felt as I had been here before, feeling the cold damp on my skin, hearing the echo of the gurgling through the stone corridors. Maybe my mind was simply remembering a previous time we had come here, to this cave in Blaustein. Within, I found a book upon the floor. A strange thing, for the creatures here to keep such an item. "The Illusion of Free Will". The book speaks about how one's actions are simply predetermined responses, created from one's upbringing and animalistic nature. I do not believe this to be false, of course, as I was taught to follow in Torm's light, and thus I strive to do, but those of a more horrific upbringing are prone to a criminal nature. Thus is the balance of law and chaos, of good and evil. But, to suggest the control of one's thoughts and actions, to keep society from falling into chaos? Such speak is chaos itself, for there can be no balance when one side is controlled by the other. Yes, I fight for what is good and just, but I would not stand for a power such as the Illithid possess. Our thoughts and actions are given guidance by our nature, set in stone as we travel through life. This does not mean that we lack free will. We all have choices to make, but will always seek to lean one way more than the other. Having the power to dominate society through the control of thoughts is what would eliminate free will. Our nature guides us, not the hand of some wizard of higher power, nor should such power be suggested. I haven't been lied to, but neither have I been told the truth by the ones I need to hear it from. The stories and whispers I have uncovered are hard to believe. Why would some information stay hidden, if not to simply keep someone else protected by a veil of falsehood? Shouldn't trust be the solid foundation for which we build ourselves upon? There are too many questions still. Too many shadows. Am I the only one concerned with finding the truth of these allegations? Do the others know what I know? I have been from Vallaki to the Tser pool more times than I can count, but.. This time was different. This time, I was not seeking to employ myself to serve justice against the undeath of the crypts, but for the pursuit of truth. For there can be no justice without truth. And what I uncovered... Simply asks more questions. "Have a good death." His words were more of a hint to my future than anything else. A warning? No. I do not fear death, but I do not expect it at this point in my life. He is a Tempuran, after all. Such is the nature of his faith. But, something was different with him. Something changed, a dark aura. Depression? Maybe. Such was not his nature a short time ago, but then again, we are driven by the things that happen to us throughout life, are we not? I make my way now back to the lodge. Back to Vallaki, in hopes to find Arianwen or Tessaryn. I have too many questions; too many things to ask. Too many things known that they may not be aware of. But most of all... I just need to see them again, for they are my family. I did not make this decision off of a whim. After joining, it was brought to light the more literal thoughts of those within. I went to Arianwen to speak to her about what was told to me, since there was much I had heard that had not been recorded in the Kinship's logs. I trusted her to give me clarity and reassurance, to guide me. Instead, I was treated as a stranger who simply came asking questions. She immediately became defensive, as if there was some dark secret I was poking at, or as if I was implicating someone specific. This is not something I seek in a leader; I needed her to be open with me. The members of the Wayfarer Kinship are going through many hardships currently, and I am always willing to assist them with pushing back the darkness, as it has been since Renee and I first spoke, but I cannot continue to act under their unspoken code, or judge with them the individuals who are being judged without facts. "....we do not have evidence...." Justice comes from judgement, but judgement cannot be found except through truth. Such is how the halls of law and order function. Without such, we find only Chaos. She appeared from whispers and mist; a little girl, apparently lost and searching for her mother. I would not comment openly about how it pained me to see this little girl. My own childhood is unknown to me before my early teens. Sadness overcame me in this moment, a wanting to help this girl find her mother, as I never knew my own. But, logic kept me safe this evening. The Mists were simply playing tricks on Sedrik and I. Nothing but lies and games. We returned to the fire in front of the tent shortly after the girl disappeared. The days of watching the caravan come and go and expecting to see her step from it finally paid off, in a sense. It is apparent by her questions that Tali and Arianwen do not share all information with her or the other Wayfarers. I had to explain myself again; tell her my reasons. She kept asking, "But what if you are wrong?". I have placed no judgement upon anyone for which I have no facts to supply. I am not wrong. If following what was taught to me within Torm's temple would lead me to be wrong in my decisions, then my faith is a lie. This is not something I can believe. Still, I was overjoyed to see her, even if I didn't express it. She embraced me, called me her sister. If I had no modesty of me, my returned embrace would have possibly crushed her within her chainmail. Would I slip from the path of righteousness by giving in to emotion? A man came from the shadows in front of the Inn, rapier in hand. I do not know who he was, no names were exchanged. "The time for words is over." A mercenary? Hired blade? No. He was finely dressed and was well-spoken. Immediately, he charged towards me. I suspected he was undead until my healing touch failed to damage him in any way, I also did not sense an aura of chaos about him. Perhaps he was simply mad? Under the influence of a drug, or being controlled? I do not know. If I find Tessaryn or the others before leaving, I will have yet another question to ask. As she fled within a cloud of mist, I took note of the direction she took. A black cloaked woman, wielding a staff that grasped a crystal ball. The necromancer she claimed to be. Two adventurers wished to help the church by slaying the undead that lurked below, and I was inclined to assist them. Upon reaching the large chamber on the second level, I noticed the woman in the back corner, hovering over the right coffin. The other undead within the tomb failed to see her as a hostile, and I knew in that moment that we should have left. What would prompt this fool of a man to approach the necromancer? It mattered not. He was felled by the woman after my repeated attempts to ask him to flee. I couldn't leave him there, alone on the cold floor where undead tread. I left a letter with the Kinship to inform them. My divine touch put her to rest and I had no time to try and find the coffin, The stranger spoke that there was a problem in this town. A raven came to me to guide me to the stranger. It was a raven, yes, but I do not think this is our dear friend who once approached us through shadow. Still, this stranger's words strike my interest. What darkness glooms within the place he mentioned? I shall have to discover it myself. Law. It is what has found both Natalie and Dante imprisoned. It was of their own hand, yes, but perhaps through this situation, some good can be done through diplomacy, but only if the others are successful. Dante was hanged. It was his choice. Samson tried to stop them, and I felt compelled to keep order. If Dante didn't want to turn himself in, for whatever reason, he wouldn't have came. Diplomacy was not an option as the others stated. No one spoke to us about a negotiation. This has put a bad taste in my mouth towards those within the camp. I do not agree with Elrilad's actions, but I had not the strength to stop him. They kept running, despite my asking him not to, calling me names as they fled. And for what? Wanting order and their safety? There was no respect for Dante's wishes in this moment and their actions could cause Vallaki to post bounties for everyone involved, It is a fine line we walk, between helping our friends and following our faith. The gossip of this town that the stranger has sent me to has shed some light on the problems surrounding the area. Whether I can put trust in them or not will be proven with time. I have scoured the farmland and town itself, every unlocked door, finding nothing out of the ordinary. The small shed that the Kinship once delved into is simply that. No entrance to underground caves exist, it is all collapsed. I am expanding my search outward. What did he want? Why was he following me? It did not matter to me at this point. He was here, and I had not the power to slay him. But if he were to attack, I would die wielding my blade against him. But, he did not. He spoke to me, in a calm manner. "Why would I harm you?" I could not believe it, at first. But again, this land has proven to have surprises around each corner. He has directed his thirst towards those who murder against law or commit other forms of evil acts. Self-righteous? Possibly. I am compelled in this moment, both feeling the need to lay his corpse into a final rest and to see justice done for the greater good. My divine would never reach his skin, however. How could I fight someone with the power to stop time itself?, I did not know you as a close friend. The first time I spoke to you was soon after the passing of Renee. My heart broke for you, watching you slump in the chair beside the fireplace. The code of the Kinship guides you then and now and though you fight against the evil nature that has made you by performing righteous acts, you must know that the end is ever approaching. You must prepare for it. [a spot is drawn here, as if to depict a puddle of water or a drop of blood], I have discovered the source of the cold in Kroftburg, The stranger prepared a horse for me to do so. I had almost forgotten the feeling, cool wind blowing through my hair after pushing my hood back, galloping through mountains and plains. Bliss is often a difficult thing to come by in one's life, especially for those who live within this place. I was nearly blind to those I passed, ever focused on both the rush of riding horseback and my goal. Gunnar did not respond to my letter. I fear he may be crossing a path of which the only return is death itself. Something battles within me. Something I keep hidden and locked away, but is always persistent. I have changed and am still changing, and I am not sure if I agree with it or not. So many things I have seen and been a part of here, and yet I do not feel at home anywhere I go. I act on my own, my only guidance being what I have learned previous to being brought here. I need to find a place I can call my own. I want a family. The lines are becoming blurred. I think I am losing myself. I am enjoying giving in to emotion, but am fearful of where it may lead. Michael would have wanted me to be happy, even if this could never be permanent. Torm's voice, once heard within my prayers, is replaced by personal desire. The short-sightedness of the few that contribute to our discussion sickens me. To my left and right, knowledgeable, intelligent and understanding folk, but in front of me, immaturity. Discussing law and justice amongst barbarians is fruitless, as has been proven to me time and time again. I do not agree with your statement, no, but that does not mean I do not want the same end. Leander seeks Barovian justice, as proven by his actions. That is not a valid reason to have him slain, and chasing this reason directs one towards the path of chaos. It is truly surprising to me, to hear of someone wanting to so freely throw themselves into the arms of darkness. Seek to put him to rest because of what he is and walk the path of light. Three days lost within the Mist, yet by some miracle, I came out alive. I have become too reckless with my own life. My quest from Neverwinter to Luskan was to engage in and allow support to Tymora's church, yet I spend my time fulfilling my own foolish errands. If I knew I shouldn't have said what I did, then why did I say it? I have allowed myself into confusion and I do not know why. I have forsaken friendship for a clouded sense of duty, failing to uphold even the simple ideals taught when I was rescued. I have wounded the wrong folk. I wish I could go back to the beginning. Time spent within prayer, hours within the silence, begging for Torm to answer me was met with... A whisper. What is this dark power that traps us all here? The Mists are but a tool, controlled by something hidden in shadow. If Torm cannot answer a simple prayer, how is it he is able to gift me the powers that seem to grow with each passing day? My prayer was answered not by Torm, but by something else... Something shrouded... Something I cannot yet describe. How could it be? I have served many years within the shared halls of Tyr's and Torm's faithful, yet the little time I have spent here has grown me in powers I never imagined to have. I can feel the ability to wield the fabled blade of holy nearly within my grasp... I have questions. Some that cannot be answered by those that dwell within their individual sects. How can I serve the multitude of broken and lost souls that reside here and fight against the demons and devils without first knowing the truth of this place? There are only a few that I know would have the answers, or might have the answers, but to seek them out is a dangerous road to take. But still, truth demands bravery. I have been productive, I think. Had I not sought to correct my mistakes, I would have been my own undoing, and if it were possible to return to the beginning, I would have. But I cannot. The things I have said against whom I once called family was a great fault of my own. I allowed untruth to guide my judgement and was greatly mislead. The only solace I can find from this is through the highly undeserving forgiveness that has been offered so far by those I have had the chance to seek it from. There is no guidance from Mount Celestia that I can see or hear in this place, so I must try to act as The Loyal Fury would see fit. The time spent questioning my faith has yielded only a wane of my abilities. I will let his past answers echo within my mind as a reminder of his guidance and will stay faithful in prayer and duty to his domain and his alone. The gates are opened and I have returned to Barovia, Wachter lands, My first few days have been met with a cleric who both claims to be an Ezrite and attacks random companions, a monstrous werewolf beast that we were able to chase off, an appearance of many monsters from within the Mists in front of the Lady's Rest and a Caliban who calls the Vallaki sewers his home, attacking any who delve below. Though, I fear another darkness that is brewing. One that may be guided back to the light, if reached in time. I will seek you out, my friend, before salvation becomes lost. Dare I record recent events as a scribe in my own book?, I must ask for help, Gunnar. I have heard nothing from you in three days since you walked beyond the castle's gates. I fear you are lost - not to yourself, but as a guest in his home. This fate drills in the back of my mind and grows in pain with each passing day. There are others who can help before such actions as you proposed must be taken. I'm tired of hiding, tired of being the person I do not want to be. If this place is truly to be my test, why not give everything I have to pass it - duty, loyalty to justice, obedience? Emotion.. True emotion..
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